Networking....

I spoke with our caseworker yesterday and she said they really don't have any birthmothers at the moment who haven't already picked families that are due before Fall. :( That got me thinking that maybe I should try "networking." I honestly don't know where to start or how to "network." I've heard about other people finding "situations" thru facilitators, attorney's, etc. I am thinking about just looking around. It can't hurt I suppose! :) Our fees with our agency are a lot lower than most so I'm not sure I'd even find anything we can afford but at least I'll feel like I'm doing something! If anyone reading this has any suggestions on "networking" please let me know! Our family & friends all already know about our adoption journey so that isn't a networking option really.

Sadness...

Well it's been a while since I've posted and a lot has happened. We were supposed to meet the birthparents that choose us on June 7th. We got a call on June 6th that the birthmother was in labor and at the hospital. She wanted to meet us before the baby was born so we rushed down to the hospital. We met her, the birthfather, her mother, her sister, & her best friend. They were very nice and we really enjoyed getting to know them! The baby was born about 1 1/2 hours later while we sat anxiously in the waiting room. We got to visit with them more afterwards and got to see him. He had some medical issues and was on a feeding tube so we couldn't hold him. He was 5lbs 9.3oz and was 17.5 in long. He was 4 weeks early! We went back down the next morning and visited with the birthparents and got to see the baby a little more that day. They were supposed to sign the papers the next morning. We got the call around lunch that they had decided to parent. :( We were devastated as we had already bonded not only with the baby but also with them.

The past week has been hard but we know that God has a plan and are trusting in him! We learned a lot from the experience and hope they learned something from meeting us as well! We are praying for them and the baby. He had to have surgery when he was 2 days old. We did get word that he made it through surgery ok and should go home in about another week. We are happy for them and hope everything continues to go well!

Now we are back to waiting again. :( As you know, I'm not good with waiting so this idea has been very hard for me. I think the worst part now is that Motherhood, something I've waited for so long for was so close and then it was taken from me and although I know I will eventually be a Mommy, not knowing when that will happen is very hard for me! I know that it will get easier as the time passes and I just hope I can keep myself busy enough to keep my mind from dwelling on it!

We are matched!!!!

We got the call around 12 p.m. today! We have been matched with an expectant mom who is due July 15th with a baby boy! We are beyond excited. I can't even explain how surreal it feels. It has definitely been a wonderful yet strange day! :) I can't wail until July!!!! We are going to meet the expectant mother on June 7th. I can't wait to meet her and just hope she likes us in person!!!!!

Lazy Saturday's are the BEST!

Don't you just love the weekend? Especially when you can be lazy and do absolutely NOTHING if you want? I know hopefully we won't have many more of these but they sure are nice for now! :) I especially need it after the week I had! It was crazy at work this week. We didn't have computers for 1 1/2 days which made the crazy week even worse. Luckily I survived!

On Tuesday morning, I got an email from our caseworker about a baby that was already born and in need of a home. Everything about the situation was perfect except 1 thing. I won't go into details for privacy reasons but it was really hard to not respond to the email! :( It was such a surreal moment though getting that email. I didn't realize how it would affect me. She did find a wonderful home so I felt much better after hearing that! I also heard from our caseworker that they have been a little busier with birthmothers lately so hopefully we will hear something soon!!!

Back to Realty!

Well it's back to realty today! Ryan & I took a very short notice trip to Hilton Head last week. It was a much needed break from realty!!!! :) We had a great time but are glad to be home. It was nice because for the 1st time since we have been going through the adoption journey, I wasn't attached to my phone 24 hours a day! I purposefully left it in the condo for most of the trip. It was nice to not be constantly looking at it to see if I've missed a call. Now it's Monday and back to realty! :) It's going to be a busy busy week but I'm refreshed and looking forward to it!

I heard from our caseworker a couple of weeks ago. I had asked if we had been shown. She said no. So it's been about 3 1/2 months and we haven't been shown once. She said it has been extremely slower this year than in past years. :( I'm trying not to get discouraged but it's hard to know that we haven't been shown at all yet. Hopefully things will pick up soon!!!!

Happy Friday!!! :)

I'm so glad it's Friday!!! This week has been a good but long one! I noticed I had not posted in a few weeks and thought I should post something. I really don't have any adoption updates. We are still just waiting. This phrase "We are still just waiting" is something I have gotten very used to saying on a daily basis! I know people mean well but I can't seem to get them to understand that as soon as I hear something, I'll let them know!!! :) I do appreciate that they all care so I can't get too aggravated! I can't believe we have been waiting for 3 months now. It has actually gone by really fast looking back. I'm still hoping for a Spring/Summer baby!!!! :) This week the waiting hasn't been as hard as it has been. I've really been focusing on work and enjoying my time with Ryan!!! I did buy my first baby outfit ( I have lots of clothes but my sister has given them to me so this was my first purchase! :)). I didn't need it because we have TONS of clothes ( Thanks Amber!!! ) but it was on clearance for $3 so I couldn't pass it up. That's what happens when you are shopping for a baby shower gift for someone else! Ryan didn't go with me this time so I was able to look around a lot longer than if he had been with me. I'm so thankful that a baby shower is no longer something I dread!!! :)

I'm looking forward to a good weekend! My little ( or not so little actually --- he's 17.. :( ) brother is coming to spend the night with us tonight and we are going to some yard sales tomorrow morning!!!! It will be fun!!! This will be the first time I've been where I'll actually want to stop at the ones with all the baby stuff. LOL Ryan might kill me when I come home with LOTS of stuff. At least it will be cheap!! :)

Waiting is so hard! :(

Well we have been officially "waiting" for almost 2 months now. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be. I think the unknown is what makes it hard for me. I think if I knew when it would be, even if it was going to be a while, it would be easier than knowing that it could be anytime! I try not to dwell on it but it is always in my mind. Hopefully the warm weather will help me to not think about the wait as much! :) I asked our caseworker last week if our profile had been shown yet. She said no and that they didn't really have any birthmothers that were at the point of looking at profiles. I almost wish I hadn't asked!!! :) My sister & nephews spent the night with us last Friday night. I loved having them all here. My sister has 3 boys ages 3 (almost 4), 2, & 4 months.  My youngest nephew is growing so fast! They all are adorable and I miss them already!!! I'm hoping we can make a trip down to visit them soon!!!